Living life with steps of faith

In the Bible we are instructed to give thanks in all circumstances. There is a point of obedience to that instruction, but there is also a point of authenticity in obedience to that instruction.  I can give thanks for this time of infertility, but I can also be grateful for it. Last night, for the first time I gave thanks and meant it. The gift of childlessness has opened up a wide variety of possibilities for me and my husband regarding our future life together.  Just as marriage for some can interfere with their fulfilling many purposes in life, whereas for others marriage opens up the opportunities for ministry.  So to both having children and not having children create two different routes for ministry and life. As a couple we can use this period of our lives to pay down our debts, build a solid foundation for our marriage, and prepare for the adventure that awaits us in the next stage of life.  And I have to admit that this sounds quite exciting! Rather...

"Brothers and sisters, we don't want you to be unaware of the troubles that we went through in Asia.  We were weighed down with a load of suffering that was so far beyond our strength that we were afraid we might not survive.  It certainly seemed to us as if we had gotten the death penalty. This was so that we would have confidence in God, who raises the dead, instead of ourselves. God rescued us from a terrible death, and he will rescue us. We have set our hope on him that he will rescue us again since you are helping with your prayers for us. Then many people can thank God on our behalf for the gift that was given to us through the prayers of many people." - 2 Corinthians 1:8-11

This Sunday I fell off a member of my church's pedestal.  And it hurt some when I fell.  From this person's perspective, I had done wrong; from my perspective, I acted with grace in alignment with the church's teaching.  I have to admit that I don't like having people not pleased with me.  I want to correct or fix the situation.  But what I realized today as I sat before God, contemplating the wise words of a woman of prayer in our church and the words just read of Jean-Pierre de Caussade, I should celebrate and be glad that I fell, because I never should have been on the pedestal in the first place. I can come up with very human reasons as to why God is blessing us as a gathered community of faith right now.  I can also come up with very spiritualized reasons.  But I know that according to God's word and my life experience that it rains on both the righteous and the unrighteous.  We may be in a season of blessing right now, but I am sure we wil...

This morning during my devotions I read a quote that really struck my attention.  I would use the quote here, but if I did I would be taking it out of context as I don't believe I interpreted it as the writer intended. But, how I interpreted it was meaningful to me.  The idea I heard was that sin is something we discover that becomes deeply ingrained within ourselves.  I like this idea, because as I have discerned sin in my life, I have often found that it is something I've been doing for a while and never considered to be sin.  I often find my recognition of something in my life as sin to be quite surprising and then I feel sorrowful because I hadn't realized how what I had been doing had been so hurtful to myself and others.  I like this concept because it speaks to those areas that seem so right at the time and can be justifiable until we are enlightened to view it differently.  And I like this perspective because it shows how sin can go unrecognized, an...

Just 5 days ago my husband and I learned we were making a trip back to the city in which we started our marriage.  He still works for his employer there, even though we've moved over 1,000 miles away. Tonight we decided to go out for dinner with friends. As we were walking into the restaurant, much to our surprise my husband found a group of his co-workers from a previous employment enjoying dinner together.  This group hasn't gotten together for a while and they are now all working for different companies.  They decided some time had passed and it would be good to reconnect.  Why they chose a Wednesday evening to do so, we don't know, as this is not typical behavior for this group.  Ironically, when we walked into the restaurant they were in the middle of discussing my husband and wondering what he was up to and where he was at these days.  There are thousands of restaurants in this city, hundreds within a few miles of our hotel, and this group of old frie...

This morning I read the story of Joseph interpreting the Pharaoh's dream with the result being those living in Egypt were saved from a famine.    In this story, Joseph's response to Pharaoh's request to interpret the dream stood out to me, "I cannot do it, but God will give Pharaoh the answer he desires." (Gen. 41:16)  Then I opened up my Bible and read from the 11th chapter of Hebrews and listened to the stories of people who took "risky" steps of faith, some resulting in their own torturous death.  This chapter concludes with these words, "the world was not worthy of them" (Heb. 11:38) and "These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised, since God had planned something better for us that only together with us would they be made perfect." (Heb. 11:39-40) I know a handful of people who have the faith of Joseph and could say "God will give Pharaoh the answer he desires" without ad...

So, I don't write poetry often, but observing the pattern of the week and the weather outside, I felt compelled to write. I feel the raindrops swelling on my eyes. I see the green waves flowing over high. I see the mountain breath crisping in the air. And I feel the drowned out cloud of despair. Yet I stand here Not yet alone. God's grace billows a soft blue tone. My heart quickens beat as the light does not retreat .... and the dish runs away with the spoon.... Okay, this is where I am stuck - on the very last line. how about and angelic whispers remind me of home. So.... I feel the raindrops swelling on my eyes. I see the green waves flowing over high. I see the mountain breath crisping in the air. And I feel the drowned out cloud of despair. Yet I stand here Not yet alone. God's grace billows a soft blue tone. My heart quickens beat as the light does not retreat. And angelic whispers remind me of home.

One of my favorite New Testament stories is of the Samaritan woman's encounter with Jesus at Jacob's well.  I love this story, because it models to me what it means to share the gospel.  In it, I am reminded to speak the truth in love, to invite my neighbor to have his or her thirst quenched by the Living Water, to use what is before me as a tool for witness, and to reach out to those who are marginalized by society.  I typically interpret the woman to represent in modern times those disfranchised in society by race, poverty, or culture.  But, today when I read it, I saw it in a new way.  The Samaritan woman had faith. She believed in the Torah and worshipped God.  She was at odds with the Jewish believer because she chose to worship God in a different way and she rejected parts of the Scriptures.  I read it and I heard an encounter between Jesus and a Muslim woman. I also heard the part about her having several husbands in a new way.  Previ...

Isaiah 55 - 56:8 (NIV) "'Come, all you who are thirsty, come to the waters;  and you who have no money, come, buy and eat!  Come, buy wine and milk without money and without cost.  Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy?  Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare.  Give ear and come to me; listen, that you may live.  I will make an everlasting covenant with you, my faithful love promised to David.  See, I have made him a witness to the peoples, a ruler and commander of the peoples. Surely you will summon nations you know not, and nations you do not know will come running to you, because of the LORD your God, the Holy One of Israel, for he has endowed you with splendor.'  Seek the LORD while he may be found; call on him while he is near.  Let the wicked forsake their ways and the unrighteous their thoughts. Let them turn to the LORD, and he wil...

This has been a week of God sightings. This past Monday immediately after receiving a phone call that could have made me very nervous, a beautiful, bright rainbow with clearly defined colors appeared perfectly framed by my living room window on a sunny day.   It was as if God was saying "I promised" and "It will turn out alright." This morning I had a dream where an acquaintance came to my door and asked me to intercede in prayer for him.   And this past week my mom encouraged me to contact this pastor who lives 1,000 miles away whom I have never met to see if he would be willing to meet.  I contacted a member of his church and within 24 hours I received an email response saying that this pastor will be in my neighborhood this upcoming week and was given his cell number! In none of these circumstances was I expecting to hear from God.  Perhaps I should be listening more!

I just realized that John 3:16 is Jesus' words about himself prior to his crucifixion and resurrection! Crazy, huh!  Jesus, in a private conversation with Nicodemus, a Pharisee who admits that he and his fellow Pharisee's recognize that Jesus is a teacher sent by God, gives this lengthy testimony to his own identity. - Jesus speaks of what he knows and what he has seen. - Jesus has chosen to speak of earthly things, recognizing that if they can't believe the earthly things it will be difficult for them to believe the heavenly things. - he speaks of the future has if it is already past - "No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven" - he basically identifies himself as "the Son of Man." - he claims that as the people were healed by looking at the snake Moses lifted up in the wilderness, so those who look at him when he is lifted up like the snake will be healed/receive eternal life. and it goes on from there.  Just take a ...

I've just begun reading through the facilitator's guide for "The Significant Woman."  I realize as I finish this first chapter that I am afraid of normalcy.  I am terrified of living a normal life.  I feel that if I do, I will have failed.  I will have failed God, failed my family, and failed myself. I believe this fear comes from a deep sense that I am called for something great.  Is that too arrogant of me? This sense of calling leads me to always be watching for that thing that I am called to do and leaves me with the question "Have I already completed it?"  There is a part of me that wonders if I have already done what God destined me to do and if so, will the rest of life be boring? Recently I heard a story on the radio about a man who had been respected as a faithful/devout Christian who did not finish his life well.  I fear that too -- not finishing well. In many ways I think the older I get the harder it is to be a Christian.  As I d...

"As you go, proclaim the good news, 'The kingdom of heaven has come near.' Cure the sick, raise the dead, cleanse the lepers, cast out demons." - Matthew 10:7-8 Do you ever wonder why these miracles don't seem to happen anymore?  I've been reading through the gospels and I am struck by the loudness of the theme of healing.  The good news in the gospel accounts isn't just that God has came to us through Jesus Christ, but that the healing authority of God has come to us through Jesus Christ. Do you think this is still true today? Sometimes I think we U.S. Christians have it all wrong.  I think we've missed the message and missed out on the supernatural aspect of faith.  God can still work miracles today!  And it seems in my reading of Scripture that God wants to work those miracles through us.  So, why aren't we letting Him? Prayer:   God, You Created, You gave Life, You Healed.  Help me to experience Your miraculous, supernatural power today....

"'Not everyone who says to me, "Lord, Lord," will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven. On that day many will say to me, "Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many deeds of power in your name?"  Then I will declare to them, "I never knew you; go away from me, you evildoers."'" Matthew 7:21-23 (NRSV) Oh, wow!  I just finished re-reading Matthew 7:21-23 and I am left stunned.  This passage tells us that people will do miraculous things in the name of Jesus Christ, yet Jesus will claim that He never knew them!  That gives me pause.  How can this be?  People will prophesy, cast out demons, and even do deeds of power and give Jesus Christ the credit, yet Jesus will claim that He didn’t know them?  Why? I look back at verse 21 where Jesus says that the ones who enter the kingdom of heaven are those who do “the will of my Father in heaven...

Tonight God taught me a very important lesson. Over the years when I have "let go, let God" I have handed over aspects of my life to God and said "here God, if you want to take it away, I trust you." But what I realize now is that this is an Old Covenant way of thinking. When Abraham took Isaac up the mountain to sacrifice him, he was ready for God to take Isaac away. But that is not what God did--instead God redeemed Isaac! God redeems! So, to "let go" and to "Let God" is to trust God in what we know to be God's character. God is a giver of life. God redeems. God brings fruit! So tonight I hand over with joy all aspects of my life and I hand over everything with a sense of giving out of my abundance, knowing that God receives this gift and will handle it in a manner that is truly good and life-giving! Tonight I "let go, Let God" knowing that God does and will redeem!

This morning as I took a shower I dream about a sermon series I will do once I am the pastor of a church. It was a series that would take place in the summer and the theme would be bio-ethics. I thought about how I would start collecting information in different files for different possible sermon topics, speakers I would have come for an adult Sunday afternoon VBS, and a fun children's Sunday School/VBS curriculum that I could design. Switching between regions of the United States gives me access to whole new kind of resource. My current job has connected me with Christians who are experts in their fields and have learned how to integrate their faith with their work. There is a gift in this. But there is also a gift in my home region and that is a sense of stability and intimacy among a Christian community. In that region I imagine myself doing sermon series that go deeper into one's spiritual walk in a different way. I would still do a bioethics series, but it would probab...

Sometimes I feel like I am a walking oxymoron. I am both a mainline Christian and an evangelical Christian. At the same time I am indifferent toward or reject aspects of mainline Christianity and aspects of evangelical Christianity. I like to say I am only a Christian and that I need no modifier to explain my faith. Yet I get cornered into situations where I get labeled as either one or the other or am pushed to say certain things that make it seem as though I identify with one over the other. In my inbox right now I have an email from a mainline church that references my role on their evangelism team and an email from an evangelical church that references my role as a facilitator at their evangelism training. This is craziness! It is craziness, because I suspect each church would be uncomfortable with the other church's methods of evangelism. So I wonder - is there something wrong with me? Why is it that I can identify with both methodologies and both messages and see the stren...

Even though I was very much opposed to Sarah Palin being the Republican choice for President... er, I mean Vice President, I would be a huge supporter of her starting her very own talk show. The release of Palin's new book, "Going Rogue" and her much (too-long) awaited appearance on the "Oprah Winfrey Show" seem to have appropriately gained U.S. Americans attention as well as my own. I agree with both Jeff Simon, from "the Buffalo News" and Oprah, Sarah Palin would be a great talk show host. (See Simon's article: http://www.buffalonews.com/494/story/864456.html ) Palin would be a draw for conservatives and Christians and perhaps she could still end up being the "magic" the disillusioned Republican party needs. She may not be President, but we all know how influential talk show hosts and media personalities can be -- just look at "O." Perhaps McCain wasn't too far off course - Palin perhaps is the key to his party's futur...

"Have mercy on me!" How often have I heard a begger cry out these words or words like them. Arm outstretched, cup held out, "Have mercy on me!" I purposely don't carry cash so that I will have an excuse not to give, but perhaps I should purposely carry cash for the purpose of giving. "Have mercy on me!" Imagine this, Jesus walking down the road with his followers, on their way out of Jericho they pass by some beggers on the side of the road. They continue walking. Jesus continues walking! Meanwhile, this blind man on the side of the road hears a crowd approaching as usual, but something about their conversation sounds different. He tunes in his attention and catches a few words "healing" "see that look on their faces" "faith" "the words..." He realizes that Jesus and his students are about to cross his path. Jesus, the one who he has heard can heal his blindness, so that he once again will be able to see! The...

"What are my blind spots?"... What are my blind spots? What are they? The advantage of the person who is physically blind is that they and everyone around them is aware of their blindness. But spiritual blindness? Perhaps everyone around me is aware of my blind spots, but am I? Yesterday I was reading from the book of Hebrews and I noted the style of writing and how it sounded like my peers who overly speak Christianise. Maybe, we are supposed to speak Christianise... Maybe this language is supposed to come out strong... In our small group, the leader has that goofy, smiley young conservative Christian look on his face and words like "Lord," and "brother," and "humility" come flowing freestyle from his lips. It makes me uncomfortable. I excuse my uncomfortableness by considering myself a more mature Christian and having a better understanding of how to be a witness to the world,... but perhaps he is right and I am the one who is immature, self...