My Two Best Girlfriends

The most difficult decision I've had to make thus far in preparing for our wedding ceremony was selecting the maid of honor. I have two best friends who I have asked to be bridesmaids and I love them both dearly. I call them both "my best friend." I know that the word "best" implies only one, but for me, I've never been able to nor felt a need to choose one of them over the other. They are each my best friend in a different and unique way.

Recently my grandmother asked me to read the book "The Shack." At one point in the story the main character is asked which of his children he loves the most. His answer is simply that there is not one child he loves more than another, he just loves each child differently.

How would a mother choose between daughters as maid of honor? How would a sister choose between siblings to be the maid of honor? In my situation it would have been the easiest to choose my sister, but I really want to have one of my best friends fill that role.

When it came down to making the final decision, I thought about the role of the maid of honor. The first, according to "Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette" is "to be a best friend." Both of my best friends are and will continue to play this role in my life. They are forever friends. At our wedding, I know they will each in their own unique way fulfill this role, which they have always fulfilled. They will encourage, advise, love, support, and care for me as I prepare for marriage and carry-out my commitment to my future husband. And I hope to do the same for them as they continue to fulfill their wedding vows.

The second role of the maid of honor is to help the bride with the logistical wedding preparations, to help coordinate the wedding, and to help the bride get dressed. I can imagine both of my best friends helping to make my fiance's and my special day go well without any major glitches. They each will play their own role that matches with their personalities and giftedness. I feel so blessed to have such wonderful friends!

So, I finally made my decision as to who would be my maid of honor based upon who I thought would most enjoy making decisions about all of the "wedding stuff:" the flowers, the colors, the decorations, and who would be most comfortable with directing people on the day of the wedding. It was a difficult decision to make, but I made it.

Now, on to the rest of the wedding planning, which is less stressful....


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